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Willpower - Change

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How do we keep our chins up when all the energy in the world keeps saying no? I get asked that question every day, and I guess people don't realize for every "no" there is a " Y E S" . Everyday I'm the background person pushing, and dreaming that maybe those doors that are only cracked will open up all the way.

Most of us have reached that point in our lives where we know we are not scared to put the work into something, but unfortunately it is difficult to find the people that will notice and compensate you. We live in a society where those that are putting the work,effort, and are ethical are paying the price for those that just get by with no intentions of ever putting in effort unless they are in jeopardy.

The first way to change is to take control of the things in your power. Yourself, your attitude (phew that one gets tested), the people around you.

I read the best article the other night. It was about willpower. You say you need to make a change but you can't - you're weak, you have zero self-control (sound of forehead being struck) Here are the three R's to transformation. 1. Relating 2. Repeating 3. Reframing

Sometimes we feel that that change hasn't happened because we didn't try hard enough, or weren't brave enough. I said it before, that sometimes it's hard to admit, but sometimes no matter how much you have in you, you just can't do it alone. To get "unstuck" it's good to have a "relationship" with a person or a group who shows you the way. "It has to be an emotional relationship with someone that inspires hope and belief, who makes you say, If she can do it, I can, too." Of course I am a passionate person, and I take that as a very big compliment since without passion life would be such a flat-line (that's the next blog). Look for people who intrigue you and make you say you want to be them, how does that work for them? Then form a relationship and learn from it. In the article it states that you can't argue with living proof that has done it, made their change, and modeling yourself on them is the best way to do the same.

So don't fret. Crossroads, and one with so many distractions is one of the most difficult things we all face on our path to self discovery, happiness, life, change. The first step is to recognize that there is more, that it will be better, and not to settle in life.

"And if the person that inspires you isn't a good teacher or doesn't have the time to form the relationship that will help you change, keep hunting. Act as if you life depends on it."

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